I’ve seen this post in and around the Interwebs before. As far as I can tell, this was originally posted by an anonymous Mother in Austin, Texas. She describes the 26 things her children have taught her. Every time I read it, I giggle. Not only is it funny, I think it is brilliant. Only a parent can truly appreciate it.
- A king-sized waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4 inches deep.
- If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.
- A 3-year old’s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.
- If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20 x 20 ft. room.
- You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
- When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit.
- A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way. (a wiffle ball still does enough damage)
- The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn’t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
- When you hear the toilet flush and the words “uh oh,” it’s already too late.
- Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
- A six-year old can start a fire with a flint rock even though 36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
- Certain Lego’s will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old.
- Play Dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.
- Super glue is forever.
- No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can’t walk on water.
- Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
- VCR’s do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.
- Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
- Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
- You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
- Always look in the oven before you turn it on. Plastic toys and ovens are a bad combination.
- The fire department has a 5-minute response time.
- The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.
- It will, however, make cats dizzy.
- Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy. (Very True)
- The mind of a 6-year old is wonderful. First grade…true story.
P.S. 25.6% of the men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid